I WANT (2020)




I Want is a six channel video installation made as my graduate thesis show. Originally intended to be a public exhibition in March of 2020, the installation now exists as a virtual recreation. This virtual installation can be experienced by downloading the application here. Mac and Windows versions are available.

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Gamespaces are often coated in a photorealistic veneer: .jpg skins warped onto three- dimensional geometric skeletons. Underneath the illusions are unsanctioned parallel universes. Faux flora dots the surface of these iridescent sublime glitchscapes. This is only possible to see through a refusal of a game's systems and code: glitching, modding, and hacking. There's a term to describe these tactics of intervention: countergaming.

If my interest is in making game environments into queer spaces for unlearning and introspection, is it enough to just inject queerness into the code of the game? A heterocentric game with a rainbow filter is still a heterocentric game: a queer ludic experience needs to be built from the ground up to incorporate queerness at its core.

Machinima, the practice of making films using video game frameworks and assets, could be the answer. By translating the game away from its original context and boundaries, new queerer realities can emerge. There are no restrictive gameplay mechanics or invisible walls. The landscape becomes a stage. The player becomes a camera.